Twilight the Movie

Sorry Fanpires, its been a long time but I have been crazy busy with my classes and also seeing the new Twilight Movie.
I actually really liked the film. Last Saturday I went to the 4 p.m. show at the Livonia AMC with my friends. We got our tickets during the week and made sure we were at the theater an hour and half early. As the light went down in the theater the excitement in the audience grew. And then when Edward (Rob Pattinson) came on the screen the tweenies screamed. LOL Ok, I did a little too.
Anyway the first time I saw the movie I really liked it. I could have went without the cheesy guitar riffs throughout the whole movie and I did think that the beginning was a little choppy. But I loved the baseball scene and I thought the ending flowed very well.
I think you had to go into this movie and not expect it to be exactly like the book. If it was exactly like the book it would have been a 4 hour movie. People who went into this movie expecting it to be an Epic I think were disappointed. I went in there thinking some things would be different. The movie is never the same as the book. I would have changed or focused on some things that I don't think the movie did. Example, in the book I really liked the bloodtyping part which was not in the movie at all. I think they should have gone more in depth with the dinner scene as well. Also when Bella outsmarts Alice and Jasper at the airport I think should have been in the movie. But if you added all those parts it might have been too much.
I did like the characters. I thought the actors they picked were perfect once watching the film. And although I have knocked him in past posts I did like Taylor as Jacob.
Above is my take about my first experience with Twilight. Last night I saw it again.......and I loved it so much more. It was ten times better the second time around. There were things that I noticed that I didn't the first time. The first time I thought there was something off about Rob Pattinson as Edward but last night I thought he did a perfect job. The chemistry between Kristen Stewart and him I felt so much more. It by far is my favorite movie of the year. I look forward to New Moon...

Please post your thoughts about what you thought of the movie.

Reread Twilight

Good Morning,
Sunday I went to my parents house to pick up my niece's Twilight book because I have borrowed mine out to my sister in law. I got my niece's Twilight book to give to my boyfriend's sister for her to read because she has seen the previews for Twilight and wants to go with us to see the movie. I wasn't seeing her until Wednesday so Sunday night I decided I would try to reread Twilight in two days.
The reason I am writing this short post today is because I highly recommend rereading Twilight. I got the book finished in time to give it to Megan and I also found that I enjoyed it so much more the second time around. I had forgot from reading the other three books and also "Midnight Sun," how good Twilight is. It is probably my favorite of the series. There are things I picked up on the second time around that I missed the first time. I found Bella adorable, which by the end of Eclipse I was pretty annoyed with her. I fell in love again with Edward which I actually never fell out of love with him. :) And this is going to be shocking to all that know how much I am Team Edward, but I actually remembered that I did like Jacob in the first book. He was the cute little boy that Bella seduced by the beach again and not the cocky best friend.
It was refreshing to read the book again and have Twilight fresh in my mind before I see the movie.
I guess in this post, let's just talk about if you reread any of the books not just Twilight and let me know if you found it better the second time around as I did?

Excitement over the Twilight Movie!!!

Sorry everyone for not blogging for a while but I've been crazy busy with my classes this last week.

Let's get back to Twilight. I think everyone by now knows about the upcoming Twilight Film which comes out on November 21st. Keep your calendars marked!! I am so excited about this movie. Although I have seen Trailers of the movie since September, the other day I was watching Gossip Girls and actually saw the Twilight Trailer on the WB, WooHoo! I actually screamed when I saw it because I was so excited. From the many trailers I have seen it looks like it will be pretty accurate to the book.

When reading a book I always fantasize about what the characters look like and their voices. When I first saw the actors that were playing the Twilight characters I was unsure about a few. Robert Pattinson is playing Edward Cullen and I was ok with that because I think he is so HOT. Kristen Stewart is playing Bella, her appearance to me is pretty much right on but her voice is throwing me off. I don't know what it is but I don't like her voice. Taylor Lautner is playing Jacob Black. I am not a fan of who they picked to play Jacob because all I can envision him as is Shark Boy from the "The adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl." I also am not a fan of Elizabeth Reaser who will be playing Esme Cullen. She played Rebecca on Grey's Anatomy and I couldn't stand her.
http://www.twilightthemovie.com/

On this post I want to hear everyone's opinions about the Twilight Movie Trailer and the actors playing our favorite Twilight characters.

Only 21 days: 11 Hours: 51 Min: 56 Secs LOL

Edward vs. Jacob

Sorry I didn't post yesterday but I was so tired and couldn't function correctly.

So I thought about not bringing this topic up until later but I am really excited to hear all the different opinions out there about what "Team" people are on, Edward or Jacob.

Personally I am a total Edward fan. Not once did I have an attraction to Jacob. I think the reason I was Team Edward is because he reminded me a lot of my boyfriend Andrew. When I started to read these books I had just lost Andrew to cancer and I felt lost myself. Reading about the Edward character reminded me of Andrew because they both were mysterious men. Like Stephanie Meyer describes Edward, my Andrew was very chivalrous, always opening doors for me, always polite and putting me first. Like Edward would say to Bella, Andrew would also say when we first started to date it was bad for us to get close, obviously not because of being a vampire, but because of his monster Cancer. But like Bella I wouldn't give up and I saw only this beautiful being, flawless. Instantly, Edward became my favorite and Jacob didn't exsist to me.

To me Jacob simply was the best friend. I could only see him as that. I respected him when he was there for Bella when Edward left but I understood the reason Edward left. Jacob always seemed very immature to me.

I know a lot of people think that Edward was a bit possessive and there were defintely parts in Eclipse when it seems that way. After reading Midnight Sun on Stephanie Meyer's website I think you can understand a little more clearly why Edward was like that. He simply loved Bella more then anything. I also thought of it this way.... If I had a boyfriend who had a best friend and that best friend was in love with my boyfriend I would be a little jealous about that too. Jacob wasn't really subtle about his pursuit of Bella either. I didn't hate Jacob, I just didn't find him attractive.

Ok, so there is my opinion on the whole Edward vs. Jacob topic. I am really excited to hear the different opinions out there especially the Team Jacobs. Maybe I will understand what the appeal to him is a little more.

Twilight Addiction

Hello Twilight fans!

I know I said I would never write on this blog again but over the course of the last couple months I have got intrigued by a series of books known as the "Twilight Saga," by Stephanie Meyer. There are 4 books published, the first "Twilight," second "New Moon," third "Eclipse," and the fourth, "Breaking Dawn." Stephanie Meyer has also posted 264 pages of a mirrored book of Twilight called "Midnight Sun."
The "Twilight Saga" is a story about a normal teenage girl, Bella, who moves to Forks, Washington to live with her father and Bella ends up falling in love with a vampire Edward. When I first heard about these books I thought it sounded ridiculous but after the first chapter of Twilight I was hooked. I recommended the book to a few people and then continued my addiction with the other 3 books. I never read a series that fast. After recommending the book to a few people I found that they were all getting addicted as well.
To me, I started to read "Twilight" during a really difficult time. I was able to consume myself in these books to keep my mind busy. I got wrapped up in the fantasy of being Bella. It was a good distraction for me and almost like therapy.

Other discussions to follow: Edward vs. Jacob....But we will get to take in a different post. :)

So with this first post I would like to discuss what is the appeal of "Twilight" to others that have read it and why do you think it's so addicting??

Last Post

Sunday July 6th 2008 the day after his 27th birthday, my best friend and the love of my life Andrew Kogut passed away at home surrounded by his family and me. I will never write on this blog again but I wanted to tell everyone that right to his very last breathe Drew fought. He is a remarkable man that no one in the world could ever be. I love you Andrew and my heart will ALWAYS be yours...........

Last day of class

Today is the last day of class. This semester has been a hard one but I made it thru. I plan to continue to blog on this site. It's really refreshing. Maybe I'll add pictures too. I'm glad I stuck with this class, there were times when I was ready to give up on ENGL444 but I made it thru. Drew's birthday is coming up. I am super excited about that. He'll be 27 on July 5th. Well I am going to get back to work. I'll post some more later.

Seventy K

Last week Drew's brother sent him a link to the Seventy K website. It's a website about signing a Bill of Rights to help young adult cancer patients. The site says that there is data that there is not a good understanding about this age groups cancer. Please take some time to sign the Bill of Rights and look at the site. http://www.seventyk.org

Inspirational Words

Right after Drew's surgery in August when we found out he had more cancer and had to go thru more chemo, I received a card in the mail. It was from my cousin Charlotte. The card was about having Hope and inside the card was a prayer/poem about what "Cancer Cannot Do." I have kept that prayer/poem on my refrigerator to remind me what cancer cannot take away. Doing research for this blog about medical terms I stumbled upon this poem again plus two other poems, one for the Caregiver of the sick and one about Survivorship. Here is a link to those poems, http://www.geocities.com/luvstoread_2/. Please take a look at these words, they are all very beautiful and meaningful.

What is Rhabdomyosarcoma?

The new cancer that they found when Drew had surgery last August is Rhabdomyosarcoma. According to Ped-Onc Resource Center, "Rhabdomyosarcoma is fast-growing, highly malignant tumor which accounts for over half of the soft tissue sarcomas in children."
There is often a bump somewhere on or in the body. Symptoms vary by location. The tumors come from a cell muscle called rhabdomyoblast. It is treated through chemo, surgery, and radiation. This information was all found http://www.acor.org/ped-onc/diseases/rhabdo.html.
Drew's cancer is located in a really tough area, the large bowel. The doctors are trying to shrink the tumor so they can operate and remove the tumor. If he were to have it removed now 80% of his bowel would be removed and he would be on a feeding tube. As of last Wednesday after the results of his CT scan they found that the tumor has grown.

Hope

I personally believe hope and having faith is an important part of healing. If there has been anything that I have learned about this experience with Drew is that I always have HOPE. I remember a few years before I met Drew I was having a lot of issues with finding a good guy. I was sick of all the jerks that were in the world and I think I probably dated every one out there. One day, when Hope was almost lost my Mom told me to never give up HOPE. I really took that to heart and a few months later I met Drew. He is totally different from anyone of those jerks. Drew is always polite, considerate, just a gentleman. I've believed in hope ever since. Cancer is like a roller coaster, there are good days and bad, but I will never give up HOPE.

Don't know what to Say

I'm not going to post much today. I'm not really up for it. Drew's doctors visit wasn't the best and I am still kind of in shock. He is starting a new chemo today by pill which means there are still options. But the doctor thought it would be a good idea to tell Drew that they will run out of options. The only thing I can think of and hold on to is HOPE. There is always hope and like I posted yesterday HE IS STILL HERE. I have nothing more to write.

CT SCAN and Results Day

Days like these when I first wake up it seems like a great day. The sky is blue, the sun is shining, everything seems peaceful. Then a minute later reality hits me like a brick wall..........Today is CT Scan day for Drew. Usually the doctors makes us wait for the results for a week and the suspense is just about torture but today he has asked Drew to come straight to his office after the CT Scan is done. In a way it is better to find out in the same day what's going on but I'm still sick to my stomach, little butterflies fluttering around. Only hope is that for once there will be something positive. Cancer is like a roller coaster, there are ups and there are downs. Its been almost a year since Drew's last surgery, almost a year since this nightmare began again for this young 26 year old man.
November 2006, Drew began to feel a lot more pain and sick all the time. While in Northern Canada for work he began to feel really ill and realized something wasn't right. He went to the doctors and there they found a teratoma tumor that looked to be wrapped around the aorta. In June they decided to operate to remove the tumor and replace the aorta with veins from Drew's legs.
Last August 2007, on a Monday I drove at 4:30 AM to meet Drew and his family at his parents' house. We all drove to University of Michigan Hospital in a caravan. Drew drove with his brother, his mom and I in my car, his two sisters in their car, and his dad at the end. It was the first time I had ever been to U of M Hospital. I remember coming around the curve along Gettys Rd. and the hospital popping up from no where like a magnificent castle. The day was kind of fuzzy, this was a different world for me. Drew had to be there at 5:30 AM to get prepped for surgery. I didn't want to let go with that last hug I gave him before he went back to be prepped. They said that they would come get us and take us back to see him one last time before the surgery after he was ready. It was only suppose to be about 15 minutes to half hour but lasted maybe an hour or so but we did eventually get to go see him. It was the most surreal thing ever. A bunch of beds in a circle with other patients getting prepped for their surgeries. I just wanted to get through the fog and see Drew. He looked really pale and small, I was scared to touch him but I gave him a hug and told him I would see him soon. The doctors said that the surgery would take about 20 hours because it was part cardiac surgery with replacing his aorta. We were all prepared to stay the whole 20 hours until we knew Drew was safe. We all thought after this surgery Drew would be free and after recovery he could get back to his life.
In the waiting room, my stomach was in knots. I didn't know if I wanted to cry or scream. His mom kept telling me to sleep but there was no way I could do that. So I sat there like a stone, well I remember shaking a lot too. We all occupied ourselves by reading books, magazines, exploring the hospital, using the internet etc. Drew's sister in law brought up his little niece to visit us too, that was a nice little break. The doctors came out a few times to let his family know how things were progressing. I missed them both times. About 6 hours into the surgery, I finally started to settle and get a little sleepy. That's when the receptionist came up to all of us and told us that the doctor would like to meet with us to talk. We all piled into this room that looked like a tinier waiting room. All I remember thinking is its too soon, its only been 6 hours and the surgery is suppose to be 20 hours. The only person I remember in the room was Drew's little sister. She was standing in the corner to the front left of me. She looked as if she were holding up that wall but really that wall was probably the only support she had. The doctor came into the room, gloggle marks still fresh on his face. He looked exhausted and beaten. This wasn't good. He started talking but his words rushed together for me, I didn't understand a word. Then they all started to come togehter. There was another tumor they found in Drew's bowel. They couldn't cut it out without taking 80% of Drew's bowel which meant that this 26 year old man would have to live on a feeding tube. The doctor said he would not do that to Drew so he stopped the surgery. Drew had more cancer. But they didn't need to replace his aorta they were able to get that tumor out without a problem. I remember barely making it to the elevators and his older sister and I hugging each other as we went down to the ground level. I couldn't get to fresh air quick enough. I called my mom and lost it. Reality was sinking in and I was so scared. What did this all mean..................
About an hour after the surgery we were all allowed to go see Drew. All I remember thinking the minute I saw him was he was alive and through the sad news we just received I felt happy because I was still looking at Drew, he was still here. Very groggy and in a lot of pain but he was still breathing. His mom and I stayed in the room with him for a little bit. I saw some very interesting and scary tubes being taken out of him. But it was all worth it. That first day I stayed the whole night. The waiting room couches weren't all that bad to sleep on. We were allowed to go sit with him. He figured out that he had cancer and the doctors came and talked with him about options, chemo. It was all still new for everyone so there weren't any answers. He was in recovery for a week, I took that week off of work, and was at the hospital everyday, all day and sometimes stayed the night. I felt better being there then a half hour away. The first week, pain was the main issue, they really couldn't get a hold on the pain.
After a week of Drew being home the swelling in his legs never went down. The doctors told his parents to get him to the hospital right away. He had multiple blood clots throughout his legs. They also found that the tumor was getting bigger. They would have to start chemo right away. The cancer that Drew has now was identified as Rhabdomyosarcoma.
It's been almost a year and a few different chemos later and now he is in a clincial trial at U of M. Today is the first CT Scan in about a month or so and since he started the clincial trial. Every CT scan I get the same feeling I did that day of his surgery. Butterflies in my stomach and walking in a haze but the one thing that keeps me going is Drew is still here.

Drew and Me

I met Drew the February after he was diagnosed with Testicular cancer. He had just got back to working full time after Christmas. His hair was grown back already, curly blond. I noticed him right away because probably the last time I saw him he was bald. I was a receptionist at his building so I saw him walk in everyday into the Lobby and I would say "HI" or "Good Morning." He didn't actually talk to me though until February. Drew came in one morning and handed me a LIVESTRONG bracelet. LIVESTRONG is a foundation that Lance Armstrong created for the awareness of cancer and his own fight with Testicular cancer. Later that day Drew and I started to e-mail each other and he told me about his cancer and all the treatments and surgeries he had been through in the last year. I had a million questions to ask too. It was so interesting to see all that this young man had been through. He had graduated from Western Michigan University with an Engineering degree, got a great job with one of the Big 3, and then got and was fighting Testicular Cancer. I find him to this day one of the most remarkable people I have ever met. We hit it off right away and have been dating ever since, about 2 1/2 years now. The first year, things really seemed to be going OK. He still had cancer, I don't think they ever said he was in remission. In fact, I remember about a month into us dating he had a CT scan and it showed a tumor in his chest, one the doctors were concerned about, was shrinking. He gave me a Lance Armstrong book to read called, "It's Not About the Bike: My Journey Back to Life."
He said that this book would help me understand a little of what he went through and the cancer he had. It was a very insightful book and helped me get a grip on what Drew had been through.
That first year, we did a lot of things that young couples do when dating, we went to baseball games, ate at restaurants, went to some bars, etc. He of course would get winded and need to just stay home for a night because he was still sick. Drew was and still is in constant pain but he was able to control it a little more then. I can't begin to imagine how he felt or what he was thinking but things to me felt normal. Things still feel normal now, I have a boyfriend, we have little fights every once in a while, we laugh, we watch movies, we text each other and talk on the phone but he is just really sick right now. We don't go to the bars, we rarely go to movies or out to eat. But we make things work and I think our relationship is a lot stronger because of that. I think we have become best friends because of this. Cancer can't take that.
I have a lot more to write in this blog about Drew's journey with this terrible disease. I just wanted to give a background on how I came into the picture.

My profile picture

Just a quick post..........I just wanted to mention that the young man in my profile picture is my brother Chris and not my boyfriend Drew. On this blog I am writing about Drew and his fight with cancer. I just didn't want people thinking my profile picture is him. I would like to put one up but the picture of my brother and me is the most recent picture I have and it is from my 27th birthday party. Ok, just wanted to clear that up. :)

Drew's first diagnosis with Testicular Cancer

The first time Drew was diagnosed with Testicular cancer I hadn't met him yet. This was about 3 years ago, Drew was about to turn 24. We worked together but never talked. I was a receptionist where he worked and would only see him walk through the lobby. He seemed like a pretty healthy young man from what I could remember. What I didn't know then was that he was about to be diagnosed with stage 4 Testicular cancer.
Drew had been sick for a few months, pain, stomach issues, and other symptoms but the doctors could not see what was wrong with him. He had told me that by the time he was diagnosed the cancer had spread into his chest and it looked like a snow storm of tumors in the X-ray. He had surgery immediately and then started chemo for the first time. Chemo was followed by another surgery to remove tumors from his abdomin and chest area. The surgent stopped the surgery because they thought they could do more harm so they were going to monitor Drew. During all of this time he didn't work, from about last week of June to right before Christmas he was off. I had no clue what he was going through, I just thought he was on a different assignment. After I met him there was one time I could remember him coming in and he had no hair but at the time I thought nothing about this young man going through such a fight to beat cancer.

Cancer

The word "cancer" to me growing up was like a bad word or an evil character/bad guy in a movie. My Busia (grandma in polish) died from cancer when I was young. I'm sure other family members have passed from it too. Cancer starts, defined by National Cancer Institute, "Cancer begins in your cells, which are the building blocks of your body. Normally your body forms new cells as you need them, replacing old cells that die. Sometimes the process goes wrong. New cells grow even when you don't need them and old cells don't die when they should. These extra cells can form a mass called a tumor. "

Tumors that are malignant are cancerous. Cancers are named to where the cancer first starts.

"Testicular cancer forms in a man's testicles the two egg-shaped glands that produce sperm and testosterone." according to the National Cancer Institute.
Testicular cancer mostly accords in young men between the ages of 20-39.
Why all the medical definitions in this blog? To bring awareness and also a little knowledge of what I am going to mainly talk about in this blog, my boyfriend Andrew's life with cancer. Although the cancer is a struggle and very tragic, Andrew shows courage and strength everyday.

My Birthday

Today May 12th is my 27th Birthday. It was a pretty great day, I took it off from work and spent the whole day with Drew and went to my Parents house for dinner. On Saturday all my friends came out for a nice night at Doc's Sports Retreat out on the patio. Even though it was a little chilly outside. As today is drawning to an end I am trying to figure out some Exercises for ENGL 444. I've noticed that I really have forgotten all the things I've done with HTML in my past graphic design class. So I am going to stop blogging for tonight and try to figure out my exercises.

A little stressed

So I am trying to figure out my Exercise 1 & 2 for my ENGL 444 and I got Exercise 1 done pretty easily but I am having issues with Exercise 2. I have completely drawn a blank to how to create a title for my website. I had a graphic design course a while back and I did create a web page but now I can't remember a thing.

I really am going to write about Drew's cancer but tonight my head hurts and I am stressed out about the HTML/CCS exercise.

A little bit about me

My name is Rebecca Marie Hoffman, but I go by Becky. Rebecca always seemed too serious to me growing up but now I really do think it is a pretty name and I love it but everyone is used to calling me Becky. My parents have been married for something like 38 years. I am the youngest of 4 children, there are two boys and two girls. All my siblings are married and have children. I have 5 nieces and nephews and I find having these little kids in my life is very much fun and entertaining. I love it!

I've gone to Eastern Michigan University since 1999 and yes I am still working on my BA but I truly believe I will graduate one day. I went full time for about 3 years and then I decided I wanted to take a break one semester, I had just turned 21, that actually lasted about 2 years. I started working full time and have worked for the same company since although in many different jobs. I was on assignment to Ford Motor Company for about 3 years. And that is where I met my boyfriend, Drew, and we have been together for a little over 2 years. I have been back for a little more than a year direct with my company.

Today was pretty much a typical day. I went to work, we were pretty busy. I had a staff meeting which went by pretty quick. Now I am home and I plan to relax a little and make dinner.

I'll just mention briefly this about Drew because I plan on making this a topic of my blog but one thing that should be known because it is a HUGE part of our life right now is that Drew has cancer and is actually doing a clinical trial right now at U of M. So the most important thing that happened today was that it was a trial day. He texted me to let me know that the doctors said they are happy with his progress, which is awesome but he is still feeling really sick.

But I will get into his story a little more on a different day and I am definitely going to keep some things private but I think blogging a little bit about this will bring awareness to a lot of people.

My First Blog

Actually this is my second blog but my first blog account got locked so I have created a new one.

This first blog is just a test and hopefully my blogger won't get locked again. I am at work right now and don't have a lot of time to blog right now but hopefully I will be able to later tonight. In my blog I am going to write a little bit about all the things going on in my life at the moment. There are a few serious things that I would like to talk about because I really think there would be some interesting posts about it but I'll get into all that in a different post.

I am really looking forward to the summer and the warmer weather. Today is a really gorgeous day. I went out for lunch and didn't feel like coming back in.

Ok, I'll write more later.